Valentine's Day Musings

No Greetings Please!

Please don't greet me a Happy Valentine's Day.
I will just snarl a sarcastic and pessimistic: "What's happy about it?" reply.
Please don't greet me a Happy Valentine's Day.
It will just make my singleness stand out like a pimple about to burst amidst all these couples.
Please don't greet me a Happy Valentine's Day.
It will make me remember Valentines' of a long-dead past.
Please don't greet me a Happy Valentine's Day.
I might hurl invectives and scathing peppered cuss words as to why this day came about.
Please don't greet me a Happy Valentine's Day.
Because I am the grinch of this day.

*****

For singles only. . .

A (woman) co-worker of mine tells me: "Will you be my Valentine?"
Me: "I suck being anyone's Valentine. That's why I haven't been anyone's Valentine these past few years."
Co-worker: "That's ok. I just need you to hold my hand while I listen and cry to sad and depressing songs during that day. You know this Valentine's is the first time in 8 years that I've been loveless."
Me: "Well, then, you don't need those songs. Memories are great torture material for Valentine's day and you have 8 years of accumulated memories to look into."

Yep! Memories are great for torturing yourself and for self-deprecation purposes. Those memories that you try your hardest to repress and forget about are the ones that you remember like it just happened a couple of seconds ago. Memories can never be erased once it is imprinted in your head. Retrieving that memory might be a difficulty but that certain piece of information is there somewhere in you.

During V-day, memories of a long-dead past keep surfacing like it just happened yesterday. It makes me long for something I will never again experience with Kiddo. It makes me wish that I wasn't alone. It makes me wish that I didn't have all these memories at all. It makes me wish that GENYL never happened nor existed at all.

*****

This too shall pass. . .

Everything passes.
This too shall pass and soon, it will just be one those days.
But for now, I will be reveling in misery and in memories of a long-dead past.
I will be waiting for a call from Kiddo which I'll never get.
I will be anticipating a call that will never be.
This too shall pass like everything else in my life.
This is just a phase I will outgrow like every event that happened to me these past years.
Everything passes.
My misery, loneliness and heartache will soon pass too. I will outgrow it soon.

*****

I despise Valentine's Day. . .

I despise Valentine's day because I am bitter and heartbroken.
I despise Valentine's day because of all the red I see.
I despise Valentine's day because the prices in all restaurants go up.
I despise Valentine's day because I am just a me.
I despise Valentine's day because I am no one's beloved and Valentine.
I despise Valentine's day. . . it's too fucking commercialized!

*****

I am Angel. . . loathing this day!