Halloween and No Love

Something stupid

Everything's great in your life except one tiny thing: your heart is smashed into little pieces all over again. What do you do about it? How do you go about putting the little pieces of your heart together?

What I do is do all the household chores, torture myself with songs that were meant to warm my heart, work until I get a constant ringing in my right ear and generally, be mean to people. Funny that writing seems to avoid me to.

I would like to elaborate more on this topic but then again, there's no point to it. Stupidity gripped me and stupidity is still ruling me. I am now regretting that day I went to my first ball. I am regretting why I ever went with an escort to my damned graduation ball for highschool. Regret and heartbreak is such a lethal combination and it's slowly wearing me down as each day goes on. My chest always have a feeling of being crushed by a million tons of tears and repressed emotions. Hopefully soon, everything as in literally everything would go ok in my life.

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Greatest Love

People have somebody whom they call their greatest love. I had an experience with regards to it. I think I found my greatest love but then again, it also became the worst part of my life.

People say the person you love most is the person who would eventually hurt you the deepest. I guess, this is what happened to me. Up until now, the hurt from a long-dead past is still throbbing in my chest. Up until now, even though in a different country with lots of opportunities to find another, my heart still calls only one name. Up until now, I still have this stupid dream in my head.

This is what I realize with all the things that happened to me: PEOPLE SHOULD MAKE THEMSELVES THEIR GREATEST LOVE. If you love and respect yourself you would know when to stop the mediocre affair that you are in. Unfortunately for me, despite me realizing this, HE is still my greatest love.

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HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Tomorrow's the BIG DAY for everyone here in Canada. It's the most celebrated holiday wherein almost all people here become kids again. There is something about dressing up that appeals to almost all ages. There is something about the mystery of Halloween that pokes each person's brain. There is something about Halloween that makes everyone ga-ga over it.

At work, Halloween was a two-day celebration. The first day kicked off with some potluck lunch and little games of chances and SOME people were dressed up for it and some (like moi!)just donned their "REGULAR CASUAL ATTIRES". My officemate Amanda a.k.a Minky was a lucky girl. She won two prizes in the games. And she shared the biggest of the prizes with us receptionist. ^_^ Nice, ei?

The second day started with throngs of people in different costumes: some funny, som scary and some really outstanding. I was one of the few people who didn't dress up for the occasion. Why? Well, I don't want to be stared an while on the bus or the train on my way to work. Besides I also had school that day. Anyway, the managers went to their different departments and judged who had the most scariest cubicle design and they also judged the costumes of their staff.

It's my first halloween. Never experienced it back home because it's really not that celebrated except for the bars (booze! booze!) and the clubs (all the dancing and ehem. . . gorgeous men!) who put up parties for it. I still don't have a costume for tomorrow night so I might go out later to check-out stores and hopefully have a costume in time for trick-or-treat. I know I'm 21 but here, I could pass off as a 16 years old. ^_^ I'll post some pictures from tomorrow one of these days.

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I am Angel. . . wishing everyone a happy halloween! ^_^