{ Ramblings }

Listening: To the wonderful sounds of keyboard typing
Where: Cybernook of my green and white school

I'm typing this entry in one of the many computer nooks here in my g&w school. My pc's sick and I've been desperately asking people for help, unfortunately, they have nothing to give but a sorry "Go bring your pc to a technician." I don't know if I should play doctor to my pc or just bring it to those techie guys. My pc automatically shuts down after a few minutes of being opened. My messenger has the same problem. I hope he'll share his cure with me.


*****


I hate it when smoke gets in my eyes and clouds my vision. I hate it when old wounds start to open and give me tinges of pain. I hate it when people start to lecture me regarding certain things and certain issues. I hate it when I know they're right and I am wrong. I am just oh-so-stubborn!


*****


I've been absent in the blogging community for awhile now. Been too preoccupied with trivial matters and matters of the heart. My uncensored journals bleeding and crying with me these days. Confusion seems to be endless and I don't know when will it clear up. It somehow also clogs my mind and it seems like things just go round and round inside my head. I am so tired of asking questions. I am so tired of pretending to be doing the right thing for me. I am so tired of thinking of certain possibilities and consequences of my actions. I am so afraid of opening up.


*****


YOU are so good for me. I know it and other people know it. You seem like the long-lost best guy friend that I've been looking for all these years. You seem like an angel sent from the heavens. You are a good listener and I, I am just a mile a minute talker. I would like to give in to this infatuation but I am too afraid that I might drive you away. Confusion still surrounds me and it seems like discernment and divine intervention's such a far-fetch thing. I hope when my mind's clear YOU will still be there for me. Waiting for me, listening to me, and maybe, just maybe, caring enough for me.


*****


Geez! I just realized that this blog can be considered as an infatuation junkie's blog! hahaha! ^_^ Oh well, as my dear messenger told me yesterday : "Love is the thing that sells like pancakes!"


*****


Forgive me for my endless ramblings and mumbling about my somewhat telenovelic lovelife. Sometimes I just couldn't help it. Even though this blog may seem like an infatuation junkie's blog there are still sporadic instances that I somehow in some weird and deviant way make sense. Sometimes, I surprise myself of coming up with resolutions regarding certain gripes because of this blog. Happy six months of blogging to me! ^_^


*****


I am Angel. . . I am hopeful!