{Senti}

Lyrics:  Foolish Heart  Side A

God! I was freaking emotional yesterday. I don't know if its because I am: a) bipolar, b) chemically imbalanced. . .again! or c) only 5 more days before I celebrate my year of being SINGLE (or SOLO as my friend J.D. would describe our current status).

I was at McDonald's near my green and white school and I was with Ms. Mistress waiting for M and I saw this lovey-dovey super cozy couple showing their love/lust for each other not a care in the world if there are lots of people who are watching their every action. They were all touchy, hugging and french kissing in a wholesome restaurant! I was dumbfounded by their actions or maybe I was just feigning jealousy. Watching them show to the world their love/lust for each other, coupled with these love songs prompted my tear ducts to suddenly swell and let it all out. I was crying right smack at the middle of McDonald's! As in! I was crying a river of tears! Ms. Mistress was really freaked out by this suddenly display of emotional turmoil. Guess people got used to my all smiles and big laughter self that I wasn't allowed to show another side of me. . .the one that not a lot of people see.

*****

I know I am over him. In fact, I have crushes already. But still I care for him. I still do love him but in another perspective. I still worry about him. I am not hoping that we get back together. I am contented with what I have right now. I am doing just fine without him.

*****

My mouth always gets me in trouble. Ergo, even if I like a guy so much I'd rather keep mum about my feelings. I'm still reeling from the pain that I got when I told a guy that I liked him. Too much too soon I guess.